I should probably update. We had a fun night away. I should write about it, but I can't be bothered. It is weird going to other peoples' parties or to weddings that you don't really know all that well. The bride looked lovely and the reception was fun (closed ceremony) and the cake was shaped like books. The food was okay and made Kristina and Patrick sick. Afterwards we went to a terrible horrid bar, but thankfully left there and went to somewhere much cooler and I got to drink Ribena and Strongbow which was awesome. Didn't want to go to sleep because then the night would end and we'd have to come home. Didn't want to go back to the house. Patrick missed Adelaide and was glad to get back to see her but honestly, I didn't miss her at all. That fact probably makes me mother of the year right there, but never mind.
Anyway, came home. Much needed night away was nice but honestly would have much more enjoyed it and felt better for not having a wedding to go to. Felt that kind of ate up our time away! The problem is when you have something to look forward too for so long and it comes and goes, you feel worse for it once its gone. So Thats that really.
Yesterday was the anniversary of my Mum's death. It was ages ago but its still a crap day to remember. It is also my Dad's birthday today. I didn't send him a card but when I get some money I'll get him something from Ebay and have it sent straight to his house. He likes random things, which is fun.
Apologies for the BLAH post. I am utterly miserable and I hate it here. I hate having nothing to do during the day, and no real disciplined order like I'd have with a job. I don't like being caught up in the drama of my inlaws, and then the flipside, I don't like the whispering and feeling like I'm in the way because of their private business. I try really hard to not let everything get to me but I'm tired of it now and if I could just get a job then things would change. We could move and actually have a place of our own. Today I thought about how much longer I could go on like this because I'm tired and feel like I haven't been able to relax for months, and I don't know how much longer I can, because so far, nothing seems to be going our way. I want our own space. I want to be able to nest and make a home of our own. I want to be able to sit in bed and watch TV with Patrick and not whisper and tip toe around incase we wake Adelaide up. I want to be able to have it just the three of us. I feel like we're not even married sometimes. Not in like a way that there is something wrong with Patrick and I, I mean more that I'm married to a bunch of people. I'm so angry and resentful and miserable right now. Blah.
In other news, just to sum up my job search, yesterday I applied to a handful of posts. A few came back to me immediately with a no. One, came back to me with an "OOOh yes please, when can you come in for an interview?" so I gave them a bunch of days and times I was free and made arrangements to have the car if needed. People I knew that worked there got back to me saying that this was a good sign if they wanted to see me and that was half of the battle over, really getting my hopes up. Today, I get an email from the same women, telling me that they are going to pass. What the hell? I noticed that the email was sent to many as it was very general, so many it was an error. But even so, hardly very professional for a large well known company. Also, the women's email signature changed her job title on each email she sent me.
Blah. BLAH. BLAH
BLAH.
